Monday, January 3, 2011

Past 10 years

Courtney and Countess, you did the year by year thing, but I just can't do that, because they were so crazy that most of them are in a hazy blur and NOT because of drug or alcohol. This will be more of a warning post of  "not to do"

10 years ago I was just finished with taking my last two exams: 'finance analysis' and 'statistics' My kids were 5 and 10 and I had 3 jobs (teaching English and social studies at the local high school, cleaning the local newspaper building and working half time at the accountancy firm). I also had a hubby going psycho from severe chemical exposure. We were in debt to our ears and all I really remember is driving or sitting on the bus with a paper bag in my lap because I kept throwing up from stress.

Because of a number of reasons from the way I was brought up to extreme stubbornness, instead of putting my foot down and ask for help, like getting hubby to agree to treatment, etc, I just plowed on. WARNING Not a smart thing to do. In fact it is beyond stupid and highly arrogant to think that you can cope with a spouse on a mental roller coaster race to the dark realms of madness. The price really is too high to pay.

During the next years there were various smaller and larger disasters like both kids and dog getting Lymes from tics which took the kids more than a year to get fully recovered from. The dog never did recover fully, as she got cancer and died shortly after.

My iron storage hit an all time low and I was rushed to hospital and underwent one hellish hour of pure torture treatment involving an electric rod, with the result of my womb getting torched black. Literally. I bled black sot for a week afterwards. I believe I'll have nightmares from this experience for as long as I live!

I got laid off work for a few months, then was more or less forced to work a bunch for free in order to get my job back, not to mention that I was unwillingly drawn into my boss' affair with a married man, having to lie to his wife at the time. My boss and this man later got married and had two children. He is a drunk and a cheat and Man, do they deserve each other!

My daughter had a nervous breakdown at school when she was 12 due to hubby's madness() and there were councilors and meetings and whatnot for a while.  Actually, from then on the 'war' between daughter and father has been going on and is still going on. She had a couple of panic attacks during Christmas, but they also had one long sit-down-chat that hopefully did them both some good. I guess time will show.

Hubby has changed jobs multiple times due to him falling out with colleagues and/or bosses during these 10 years, he was too sick to work in periods, then started studying and got his logistics degree, then changed a few more jobs. He has finally acknowledged that he needs to work at least 4 years in the same job before changing to a new one, but as he is still constantly checking out new jobs, I'm not sure that him acknowledging is the same as him fully understanding it...

There has been tons of family drama ranging from my kid sister nearly dying from drug abuse and lack of food to Grandma Crazy going on a hate spree and not only disinheriting us all, she actually claimed we didn't exist. This was quite funny in all it's madness, but that is probably because it's hubby's grandma and not mine :P Oh, and she has since changed her mind and loves us all to pieces and has thus forgiven us! for all the things she did. I'm not sure how she managed to turn it all upside down, but reality has never really applied to this lady, ever. Thankfully the doctors took away her driving license last winter, because as with reality,  law, order and traffic rules didn't apply to her either...

My health has deteriorated and is on a downward spiral still, sadly. Hubby, on the other hand is doing a lot better and I think that the effect from his exposure has more or less worn off and most important of all, he is now aware of his issues and can take steps to lessen the effects on the rest of us around him.

Because of my stupid touch pad that I haven't yet figured out how to lock permanently I accidentally deleted the paragraph about getting to meet Sue from TBF and her hubby in 2009. That was two weeks of funness :)
(sorry Sue, you were not forgotten!)

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